Friday, November 5, 2010

The Value of Meaningful Nicknames Between Spouses

In our newsletter we discussed the great value that calling your husband by a cute nickname may have in your relationship.

In the words of Dr. Carol Bruess, a professor at the University of St. Thomas who has studied the use of nicknames in relationships, "One of the ways that couples develop playfulness is through language." 

We suggested coming up with a cute nickname for your husband, and gave you a few tips to come up with some creative nicknames for him.

If you’re still having trouble coming up with one, here’s a list for you to choose from in the meantime.  But keep trying to come up with your own; a personalized nickname, one that was truly chosen for your husband based on his characteristics, personality, or physical attributes, will have a much stronger effect.

Handsome, Good looking or Sexy
These names would light any husband's day as they give him an assurance that you find him handsome and attractive.

Big guy
This nickname would suit perfectly if your husband is tall and well-built.

Snuggle Bear, Cuddles, Cuddly Bear, Teddy Bear, Huggy Bear, Love Muffin, or Honey Bear
These are all cute nicknames to tell your husband that you love to be close to him all the time.

Hot Chocolate, Hot Lips or Hot Stuff
A perfect cute nickname for any tall, dark and handsome man. Irrespective of these traits, any man would love to hear his wife call him “hot chocolate.”
Honey, Love, Lover, My Beloved, My Life, My World, Soul Mate, Life Mate
Tell your husband that you find him sweet and attractive by using any of these nicknames. This is a great way to say that he is the man.

My Prince, Prince Charming
These are adorable nicknames for your husband that convey a sense of respect and admiration.

More (ahem!) private nicknames:

Caution: Remember haya’ (modesty)!  The names below are to be used in private only.

Tiger, Hunk, Hunky, Stud, Super Stud, Lover Boy, Playboy, Dirty Boy
Any man would love to get any of these nicknames from his wife. After all what could be more flattering than the fact that you consider him a stud? 

Have fun picking out the perfect nickname(s) for your husband; use the tips we gave you in our newsletter; no doubt you’ll experience a positive change in your relationship if you put in practice what we shared with you, insha-Allah.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

The Importance of Learning Relationship Skills

In our newsletter we discussed the reason that many couples fail to achieve the quality of life they hoped for when they decided to marry.  We stated that the main reason for this was that sharing two lives intimately and in harmony requires skill, knowledge and inner strengths that most of us haven't developed by the time we're ready to get married.  

We also stated that these skills, knowledge and inner strength cannot really be attained before we enter into a relationship; but because every body is different and unique, the best and only time to really learn the relationship lessons is while you are in a relationship. 

We affirmed that you cannot and will not ever know everything there is to know about marriage and relationships.  Relationship skills take time, effort, discipline, commitment and work to cultivate and refine, therefore, it's an ongoing process.

We discussed how to handle disagreements and what to do when arguments break between spouses.  We encouraged you to wake up from your dozing-off state and to dedicate time and effort to improving your relationship skills, particularly as they concern your spouse, on a daily basis.

Share with us!
What are some of the struggles you've faced in your marriage?  What were some assumptions you had when you first got married, but changed overtime during your married years?  What would you say is the most important relationship skill you have learned since you've been married?

The Issue of Lost Spontaneity - Part II

Continuing with the issue of lost spontaneity in the marriage, we discussed in our newsletter the dangers of ignoring this prominent threat.  We also provided a few ideas to get you started reclaiming spontaneity in your marriage.

We suggested things such as:

  • Exploring a different location together
  • Taking a class together
  • Setting up datenights
  • And others...

We stated that acknowledging that there’s a lack of excitement or spontaneity in your marriage is the first step towards reversing its effect and restoring that excitement.  We mentioned that it may take a little work and practice, but having a happy marriage does not come about easily simply because spouses love each other.  

While love is definitely important in the marriage, it just isn’t enough in and of itself to keep the marriage afloat.  Action is always and constantly required.

You must actively be participating in keeping the marriage alive and exciting.  Maintain communication between you and your spouse open at all times; keep an open mind, and exercise careful consideration of each others feelings. 

We encouraged you to let your imagination and your creativity soar, and to come up with your own ideas to bring spontaneity back into your life.

So how did you do?  Did you put in practice any of the advice we gave you?  Did you come up with your own ideas for bringing spontaneity back in your life?  Share them with us and our community!  Others may benefit from your input and insha-Allah you will be rewarded for it.